Your views and thoughts about marriage from outside differ greatly from the actual experiences from the inside.

What you see or hear, is mostly not the reality of marriage, funny as it may seem, you have to go through, or rather, experience it before some things will make sense to you.

I must say that marriages are exaggerated when it’s being talked about, especially, when being discussed by singles.

As an unmarried man or woman, you think marriage is the end of loneliness, brokenness, heartbreaks, man or woman trouble, you even think that your married friends are happier, luckier, and more favored by God.
Sometimes you resort to this conclusion due to what couples display in your presence or publicity, or because of what your parents or society think or say.

It’s important to know that most couples you see display show of love, may just be trying to cover up their fights and worries, they put up this show and make it look like they are too happy and that their relationship is healthy. Trust me, you cannot determine a healthy relationship with what you see or hear. Married people pretend a lot!. Ignore the kisses and proclamation of love that you see them put up either in public places or on social media.

It is known that there are happy couples out there. But it is also true that they have issues that they have dealt with and are also dealing with. Some cases are just worse than the others.
If marriage were a bed of roses, why has the rate of divorce increased so much, why do people fight to become single again, why do some partners regret marrying at all?

You don’t see the whole of a person until you are married to him/her. Just like having a friend, you two share everything you have, club together and are called best of friends, once upon a time something happened or because of the sweet friendship you share your decided live together and before you know it, you start fighting, arguments start rolling in, you will see the things you never saw all these years, you will start picking out their flaws and if you can’t take it anymore, you will get your own place and even walk away completely from that relationship.

Same applies to marriage and its even worse in marriage and you mostly get to live with it, deal with it, tolerate it, accept the partner the way they are, or walk away, which is usually the last option, as society frowns a lot at divorce, especially in developing countries.

When two or more married women or men sit to discuss marriage life and its issues, you will be shocked to hear what the have to say about marriage, most of the words and expressions you will see or hear are those of frustration, regrets, confusion, accusations and hope that they or that the relationship will get better.

And this is why you should stop stressing yourself about not being married and if you want to settle down for marriage, you should know that living with a total stranger is difficult, As you didn’t grow up in the same environment, Your upbringings are different, your level of exposures differ, and your ability to understand and communicate are different. Which means that there will be a lot of disagreements, views and opinions over issues and lots more.

Most people that stayed married, are there today only because they made up their mind to stay married not because, marriage is what you thought it was before they went into it.

Photo credit: pixabay


The way to success is narrow. It is indeed difficult to scale through, full of obstacles, but reachable, possibility, Courage and Determination is key to success.

Usually, some factors and or thoughts militate against the achievement of one’s goals and even taking steps that could lead to such achievements as a result of “fear of uncertainty” which holds you down, giving you reasons using the “what if” mantra so you can’t move on.
In different faces of life, this fear and questions have successfully held you down.

It has stopped you from leaving that abusive marriage killing you because you have questions such as “what if i don’t get another man?”, “will i spend the rest of my life alone?”, “what will the society say to me?”, “how will i manage to pay bills?”, “won’t my family be shamed for my sake?”.

That fear has also stopped you from accepting yourself, you are no longer living your life and doing the things you love, knowing fully well that they make you happier with life, as others do not appreciate your opinion towards life, you have been living the way others live so that you can be loved and accepted.

This fear has stopped you from even doing that Business that you really wanted to do, but the fear of loosing and not becoming successful won’t let you find your way, what if i don’t become successful and i have already left my job, how will i survive?.

You have been doing a lot of things the way society, friends and family like it or want you to.
It is time to do things your way and success is sure!.

It’s ok to fail, its ok if you try and don’t succeed, at least you would have tried, you didn’t get married again but you are alive and have found peace and happiness.

you left your paid job and tried to do your own thing, but things did not work out as expected, its ok, you can try again or try something else, the peace you enjoy being your own boss is priceless.

You must care less, if you failed, do it again and again until you get it right. Don’t let anyone talk you down, because if you can think it you can see it,. Remove the word “impossible” from your dictionary.

Pass through that road and whatever that comes your way kill it! Crush it! And if you couldn’t make it the first time, go back prepare better and conquer!
Then you will surely be successful, happy, and most of all peaceful.

Don’t be afraid to take that risk, it is better to try and fail than live your life to regret that you never tried.

Only the fearless and risk takers are successful !!